How Much???

...question to the mommas out there. I've had two days that I've been away from AR and she's had bottles. I leave 4 oz bottles for her. Both times I've been gone, the people watching her say that she only eats about 2 oz at feeding time then about 45-60 minutes later, she'll finish off the bottle. When I nurse her, I only feed her at feeding time. We don't feed one side and then do another an hour later. At most, we might spend 10 minutes between boobs and that's just when she falls asleep and I can't wake her up right away. I was worried she wasn't gaining/eating enough but after her doctor's appointment this week, she's in the 75th percentile so I'm not concerned about that.

My question is hmm...why? With less than three weeks left in my maternity leave, I'm just trying to figure out how much milk/bottles I need for the sitter. We go meet with the sitter tomorrow so I'm hoping she might have some insight as well.

The Dream Feed...

...With 4 weeks to go until I head back to work, it's time for AR, Matt and I to start our routine for bedtime. Bedtime is seriously my LEAST favorite time of day because she's crabby, I'm crabby, Matt's crabby when he's there...ugh! Plus I think I try to rush it because I know I have about 30 minutes to an hour to get things done before I need to go to bed. Some nights, she'll fall right to sleep but other nights, it's an hour long battle. We have a general "routine" but if she's fussy, the book is out. If she's sleepy, we just put her straight to bed.

For now, she gets up about once/night between 12:30-1:30 and it's not that bad. Now when I go back to work and I don't get off until 10, home until 11ish and then I'll have to get up with her at 12:30-1:30 then have us both up by 5 and me at work by 7...well, that's going to suck.

The main reasons for wanting to change this routine was because 1. I didn't think she was getting enough sleep. 2. She was SUPER crabby to the point of no return between 5-7:30 3. hoping to get her on track to sleep through the night.

I read the Baby Whisperer who says to tank them up and then give them a dream feed before you go to bed so we decided to alter bedtime a bit to see what would happen...

So let me review our routines...

What we had been doing...
5:00 Feed
5:00-7:00 AR SUPER crabby
7:00 Bath
7:30 Matt gives bottle then book and prayer
8:00 Bed
-If she's asleep after bottle then straight to bed.
-Some nights she's so crabby that it takes a good 10-15 minutes to calm her down to even take the bottle.
12:30-1:30 AR wakes up to eat again
5:00AM Wake up and start the day
-On this routine, I hated how crabby she was, for her sake not mine, because she'd get so worked up we could barely calm her down. However, she usually fell asleep very quickly.

What we're trying now...
5:00 Feed
6:30 Bath, Book, Prayer
6:45 Nurse with me
7:00 Bed
-With this, it takes her almost an hour to fall asleep with the help of a paci even after she's eaten. I hate giving her the paci because once it falls out, she cries until we put it back in...so back in, falls, repeat...about 10x.
-AR is one of those babies that you can rock her until her eyes get heavy or she's asleep and the second you put her down, her eyes pop open and she's wide awake!
9:30 Matt gives the dream feed
12:30-1:30 AR wakes up to eat again
5:00AM Wake up and start the day
-This routine doesn't really seem to make any difference. She's still getting up about the same time and we're just adding another feeding but it doesn't effect her sleeping longer.
-Some nights when she wakes up at 12:30-1:30 to eat, she takes longer to get back to sleep because she's slept longer.

What we'd like...
5:00 Feed
6:30 Bath, Book, Prayer
6:45 Nurse
7:00 Bed
9:30 Dream feed
5:00AM Wake up and start the day

I know it'll take awhile to get to the 7.5 stretch of sleep but I do feel like if we're feeding her at 9:30 then I just figured she'd sleep longer than 1:30 because previously she was eating at 7:30 and sleeping until the same time. So really, what's the point of the dream feed? I know that it takes 3 days to form a habit but we're going on a week here and the habit is the same as the one before.

I also don't feel like we have a rock steady routine. It was really nice when Matt was doing the bottle because he'd do all of bedtime and I'd get a nice break (and my boobs were very thankful!). We cut it out and let him take over the 9:30 feeding so that I could get a longer stretch of sleep. From reading books, I feel like the routine needs more cues in it...i.e. closing the curtain and saying "Goodnight Mr. Sun", same book, same person, etc...I do always end with "Goodnight Moon" when I do bedtime but some nights Matt won't even read to her or say prayer if she's really crabby or already asleep.

I do everything with the light on then turn it off to nurse. I even started leaving the light off when I nurse at 1am so she'll know it's not time to wake up and will hopefully fall back asleep (I'll leave the hall light on so I can see). Matt will leave the light on for everything (and he always leaves the wipes open too, nothing to do with routine but UGH! Sometimes he even leaves an empty container for me to find at 1AM-men!). She has an alarm clock in her room that goes off with a CD and the same song every morning in hopes that when she hears that she'll know it's time to wake up. Matt and I have discussed bedtime routine and I've told him the importance of the same thing every night but alas, he's a man so he does what he wants.

I shouldn't complain because she's really a good baby and getting up once/night is awesome! I read the books and do what they say so I get frustrated (I've been banned from saying that word at my house from my DH) when they don't work. And this isn't like breastfeeding where I can call the LC and say HELP! So I'm asking you all for HELP! Let me know what your bedtime routines are and if the dream feed worked for you all, if I should give it time or just cut it out. Any tips or advice would be greatly appreciated-thanks in advance!

Breastfeeding...

...my sweet baby girl is one week old today! Excuse me, Mr. Time, could you please slow down? I wanted to do a post on breastfeeding to get some feedback and let you know how things are going.

First off, this is something I REALLY wanted to do but was so afraid it wouldn't work. Despite not being able to BF right away (it was about an hour and a half before I could), my girl latched on no problem! However, I didn't feel like she was getting anything. Saturday afternoon, the lacation consultant came to visit us and wouldn't you know she squired collostrum clear across the room. This was the positive reinforcement I needed!

Saturday night, AR had been fed, changed, burp and was still being fussy. Matt and I didn't want to give her a pacifier because the BFing class we took said you had better success at BFing if you didn't use one. The nurse told us she couldn't take her to the nursery if she was fussy so I asked what to do and she said a pacifier. I was a bit irritated at this because the class we took was through the same hospital so it was frustrating to hear one thing then another. We made it the whole time at the hospital without giving her one but finally broke down and gave her one when we got home. Good news, it soothes her but she's not "addicted" to it. We're also trying to keep her from sucking on her hands which I think is just a natural reaction for her.

On Tuesday, my milk came in and despite what you read/hear, I didn't feel the "let down." I only knew it came in because I saw some rolling down her chin after a feeding! She feeds about 2.5-3 hours during the day and about 3-4 hours throughout the night. She likes to stay awake after her morning feedings but is passed out after her afternoon ones. Luckily, she usually heads back to bed after her night feedings although her 9ish one, she usually wants to stay up some.

Leaking, here's where I need some help ladies. I leak like CRAZY! I can tell when it's time to feed because I leak. She's doing about 10 minutes on each side, sometimes longer and sometimes shorter. I'm pretty sure I'm not draining each side but she falls asleep about 8-10 minutes and this girl is one tough cookie to wake up. Once she falls asleep and she's stopped sucking, I usually try to burp her and then give her kisses calling her name to wake her up (my favorite part!) then we start on the other side. I don't "time" it by saying, "Well, 10 minutes are up, you're done!" I let her go until she's done and she doesn't seem like she's hungry so I'm assuming she's getting enough.

The leaking isn't a big deal at this time because I'm not going any where in public but it's more annoying than anything! In our BFing class, it also says to wait until 4 weeks to pump to ensure a better BFing relationship. The lacatation consultant told me I could pump at 2 weeks. So my question is since it seems like I still have milk when she's done feeding, should I starting pumping that extra and stockpiling it for when I go back to work? I don't want to force her to eat more than she wants. I'm going to see how it goes over the weekend then just call the lacation consultant on Tuesday and see what they suggest.

The pedi also said we needed to give her a Vitamin D supplement with no iron. Matt stopped and got it yesterday, it's just a dropper and she took it pretty well. Of course, I got a coupon in the mail for it today. Thank goodness because the little bottle was $10!?!

My nipples are sore. I know the BF class said if you're doing it right, it doesn't hurt. Every time she latches on, there's a small pinch but other than that it doesn't really hurt...just SORE. Lanolin is my BF right now! Really the hardest part is just keeping her awake!

This is a side story, semi-related: Today I had fed her around lunch time but she didn't feed as long before she fell asleep. About an hour later, she was a bit fussy and I was trying to figure out what it was. Right when I figured out that she was probably just hungry and I'd feed her again, the urge came over me: I had to poop! I have to admit one of the things I was most terrified of after giving birth was pooping. Luckily, I have the past 2 mornings but not today. Of course, it would all happen at the same time!

I read books before she was here and thought I had a good idea how to do things but now that she's here, I feel like I have NO idea what we're doing. I'm not complaining, she's a good, easy baby and I'm learning to just roll with it as we go. She's learning me and I'm learning her.  It's just hard to set her down when she's sleeping or try to wake her up when she's feeding because I just love to love on her ALL the time!!!

Real Baby Advice...

...I received this email from a male co-worker last week. Aside from almost making me cry, I felt like it was "real" advice and I appreciated the honesty of it. I thought you'd all appreciate it too.

"That’s awesome (not finding out the sex). We were surprised with our first one too. We found out on the second. Both cool experiences, but I have to say, finding out it was a boy in the room when he was born was probably the coolest moment of my life.

As the father of two boys, I can tell you, boys are generally easier, but they are probably more exhausting. Girls are calmer, but they have their own issues. :)

Good luck with everything and congratulations! Try to enjoy it – as much as you possibly can when you’re a zombie from lack of sleep. And, here’s the big secret no one tells you beforehand, but you need to know… The first 4-5 months basically suck. The kid doesn’t do anything, but lay there and cry and eat. You’re exhausted, and it’s really hard.

But hang in there… because the time from 6-24 months more than makes up for it. It’s the most amazing experience to watch your baby literally learn something new every single day. He/she will go from a screaming lump to this wonderful kid with their own personality, likes (and dislikes), and opinions. And the first time your kid holds your finger or looks up at you and smiles or kisses you with a big open mouth wet kiss, well, you’ll forget all about the long nights of the first few months!"

Now go wipe away those tears!

Giveaway and Girl Names Needed!!!

...okay, all! Matt and I are doing massive cleaning and storing and packing and repacking of our house to make room for this little baby that's coming our way. In the process, I have found decorations that have been stored away and not pulled out since oh...2006 when I moved into my house!

We also need help with girl names!!! We have our boy name picked out (another post for later) but cannot agree on a girl name. Our front runner right now is Autumn but I have two drawbacks to this name:

1. Matt has a cousin named Autumn although in the 5+ years we've been together, I don't ever recall meeting her.

2. Is she going to resent being named Autumn but being born in the spring? Matt said, "No, she'll say, that's the ironic part...my parents named me Autumn but I was born in the spring." I said, "Yeah right, she'll be like, No, my dumbass parents named me Autumn but I was born in the spring!" Matt was like our Autumn would never say that. I said, I bet that's one thing we can bet she'll say.

So here's the criteria...

1. Middle name is probably going to start with an R, either Rose or Rosalee.

2. Last name starts with a G.

3. Something different, but not too out there. I loved being the only Alyssa in my classes growing up but hated my name being pronounced wrong.

4. Nothing too common...so if it's in the top 50, it's a no-go.

5. I would really like a G first name but so far haven't loved any G girl names i.e. Gretchen, Gia, Gina, Grace

I'm going to give one lucky commenter this wall hanging made by my momma. So please leave a comment with your best girl name suggestions! You have until 1/31 at 5pm to submit an entry for the giveaway but feel free to leave girl name suggestions whenever. I'll announce the winner on 2/1.

Thanks in advance for your help!

Calling All Mommies & Daddies-I Need Help!!!

...okay, I'm starting to get overwhelmed. I was so nervous/scared the first half of my pregnancy that I didn't want to do anything to get ready for the baby. Now that we've been feeling him/her and we saw our sweet baby yawning at our last u/s, I realize it's time to get moving!

We've started working on getting things ready at the house. Honestly, I just feel like we've moved everything upstairs to the downstairs and haven't really done much. I'm *hoping* Matt gets on painting the nursery on January 28 because I work all day but we'll see. Things are kind of at a stand still with what I can do at the house right now because the guestroom has been emptied so now it's time to think about the registry and nursery.

This is where I start to freak out! What in the world do I need??? I started to print off a generic list and it had like 8 different items on it for the baby to sleep in. Um...our house isn't that big so I don't think we need a crib/bassinet/portable crib, etc...for every room in our house! So please...help me!

I think we're going to register at Target and Babies-R-Us. Leave me a comment with any and all advice...what I HAVE to have, what I don't really need, brands, how much of each items, websites I should visit to check safety on products. Anything you think a first-time mother needs to know..lay it on me!

Thanks in advance!

Help! What To Do With This Blog???

...I have to say that I really miss blogging! Part of the reason I'm taking a break is because I was really letting my free time get consumed with blogging...I felt like I had to have a post every day, I felt like I had to read every blog in my blog list and I had to comment on every blog too. It was like I'd come home from work, rush around to get things done, fix dinner, shower and then I'd get on the computer for 2-3 hours/night just doing blog stuff! It's amazing how much free time I have now!

The other part is because I don't really know what to blog about here. Having experienced infertility, I'm really trying to be aware of my readers. I know how hard it was to read about pregnancy when that's all I wanted. At the same time though, I do feel like this is my blog and I want to blog about my life which includes that. I've kind of turned my infertility blog into my "pregnancy" blog if you will. I debated big time over that but my justification  is during that first trimester (and still now), I had no idea what was normal or not so I wanted to document that for those experiencing the same thing. And aside from pregnancy, I just don't have a whole lot going on right now outside of work (which I try not to blog about although we did have cake tasting at work on Tuesday which was AWESOME!). Well, I should rephrase that, I don't have a lot going on that's blogworthy! I actually do have a lot going on but it's fundraising stuff for ALA, promoting Hospital Hill and trying to tell my husband that Bethsheba is NOT an option for a girl name!

So help me out, readers! Please leave me some ideas of things you'd like to see me blog about....my thoughts on Albert or Matheny, my ideal holiday menu, pics of my cute furbabies, my thoughts on Ugly Sweater Parties....I need some motivation here! Please nothing political, I don't follow politics enough to do a blog post on that.

Let the ideas start flowing...GO!

Tuesday Tidbits...

...some tidbits...

*Used a new hairdresser on Saturday and I LOVE HER!!! She was fast, personable and I loved my hair when I left. My only complaint is that I left with a bloodshot eye because she got shampoo in my hair-holy crap that hurt!

*Sunday I was supposed to run with Ang, bike with Aimee then run again with my friend Matt B. but the crazy rain, thunder, lightning cancelled all that!

*Matt and I went to dinner last night with Amy and Chris at Trailhead. It was great to get together with them and I have to email her to set up dinner for next month sometime! She's such a sweetheart because she brought me a "happy bag" filled with all sorts of goodies. She's trying to get my hooked on Lush Lip Scrub and from just the smell of it, I think it's going to work! It's great to have good friends like these two.

*I have a lot of people coming to our house for the first time in the next couple weeks which totally stresses me out! I am always comparing our house to other people's and in my mind, ours never measures up...our house is old, not decorated enough, small and I think sometimes it smells funny. It's seriously all I can think about though!!! So if you're one that's coming over, don't be hurt if I make the tour a quick one, ok?

*My mom is coming up this weekend and we're going to see Shrek with Jess and her mom. Best part? Well aside from great company and going to the Fox...we're having dinner at the Fountain!!!

*I finally got Google Analytics connected. It's actually quite funny some of the info it brings up and scary some of the other stuff. Anyways, its been nice because I've gone back through and edited posts to take out my email and stuff like and our last name but it's still coming up in Google search even after I delete it...any idea how to change that?

*Another shout out for help! We have a point and shoot Pentax camera with 8 megapixels. The thing took great pics until Labor Day weekend then all my pics after that have been really grainy. Think I changed a setting or something? If so, what should I check? We got it in December 2007 and it's been through A LOT so it might just be on it's last leg. Some of the other functions on the camera aren't working that great. It'll be interesting to see how they print out. Any help/advice/feedback would be greatly appreciated!

*This week is just crazy busy in general. Period. The End. I love it!

The Running Outfit...

...okay so the half is less than 20 days away so I need to focus on what I'm going to wear!?! I know this sounds ridiculous BUT let's be honest here people, I'm a big girl...I have big boobs, big thighs, big butt so I have to find just the right outfit! I also suffer from "Chub Rub" this is where your legs rub together and leave a painful rash SO I typically run in capris but being that it's going to be on June 5 (hot hot hot) and 13.1 miles I figured I should find some shorts. Here are the two outfit options.

Wal-Mart: I like the top of this one because it is razor back which means cooler on my back but it is kind of skin tight when I wear it. When I got home though I tried on the bottoms and they are actually capris-grrr!
Target: Dry-fit top and bottom. Top is nice and doesn't cling to my body like the other shirt and it's very light. I'm just worried that I'll end up shoving the sleeves up my sports bra so it isn't hanging on my shoulders. Bottoms: now these are actually shorts that go to my knees, perfect for chub rub. Hubs denies that I have a panty line when I wear them or that I look super fat in them but I'm not 100% confident in them. OH! The shirt does cover my pooch(how I got lucky enough to have a pooch that looks like I've had a child even though I don't, I have no idea!)I also bought the off-brand wicking socks at Target and Wal-Mart (not to be confused with Air-Wick air freshener). The one thing I hate about these socks is one always gets lost in the laundry, without a doubt, it disappears to the laundry gnome. I wore a pair on my run on Saturday, stood at the washer, took them off and put them directly into the wash. Moved them all to the dryer then took everything out and can only find one!?! I picked up every piece of clothing and went through it and it's gone. This is so annoying!!! Grrr...

I'm pretty sure that I'm going to go with the Target outfit but please feel free to leave me your comments. And no, I won't try them on and take pictures for you-I mean I do WANT you to come back and keep reading!!!

Ending Our Relationship...

...Tuesday morning, I did. I ended our relationship. I broke up with my girl doctor. Remember this post where I told you that I got charged for a $1900 surgery that I never had and I wasn't even in town the day it happened? Well, I called my insurance company today because I looked online and didn't see the charges were reversed. Sure enough, two months later and STILL not fixed! My doctor's office told the insurance company that, "The check is in the mail." Well, they have two weeks and if the check isn't there then I'll be making a fraud claim. I'm so glad I was out of town at a conference for work so I have proof that I wasn't here.

After I got off the phone with the insurance company, I called the doctor's office and asked for the office manager. When she answered, I could already tell she sounded like a cold-hearted person and sure enough she was. I told her that I was no longer going to be using their office but I wanted to let her know why. The only reaction I got from her was when I told her that they'd TOLD me who was supposed to be charged for the surgery, I got an, "Oh my!" Other than that, when I finished, I just got a, "Well at this point the only thing I can do is apologize and make sure the money gets returned to the insurance company." OH! I was so fired up, I wanted to say, "Yes at this point, all you can do is apologize but I CAN do a whole lot more."

So for now I wait to see if insurance gets the check. I wrote a review of their office through Yahoo. It just really sucks because they are like their own people so they care that they're losing one client but I feel as though what they've done is 100% TOTALLY wrong and they don't even care nor have then done anything to correct it! A co-worker suggested I find out if they are part of the local hospital or group and write a letter to them. Any ideas? Suggestions?

I can't wait for the insurance thing to be done so I can officially wash my hands of them but at the same time they STILL make my blood boil AND now I have to find a new doctor-ugh!

The Hairs on my Chinny Chin Chin...

...yes ladies (and Slam Dunk), I am finally accepting the fact that I have hairs on my chinny chin chin. I mean this suckers are so long (and luckily mostly blonde except for the dark black ones I've picked at over the years) that I can stroke my chin hairs like Abe Lincoln while in a deep discussion or contemplating to be or not to be. I watched my mom Nair her chin for YEARS so that's why I've been putting this off so long. So any of you out there have this same issue? What do you suggest a weekly (or every other or however often) wax at the beauty shop? Nair? Self wax (if so, what kind and where do you get it)? Bleach? Shave it? Can you picture Matt and I shaving together in the mirror?

UGH! I hate getting old!!! As though shaving my legs wasn't enough of a hassle, now I have to think about shaving my chin too!

Rumor Has It...

...that I'm getting an I-Touch for my birthday (which FYI is only 8 days away!!!)!!! I'm soo excited! When I first got into working out about 4 years ago, I spent $60 on a cheap MP3 player and it's lasted me pretty well. Nothing is wrong with it but when my dad asked me what I wanted for my birthday and he denied my request for cash flow (because he knows that I'll just put it in my savings account and won't spend it), I had to come up with something. Hmmm...an Ipod? So I sent in that request and within an hour my sister calls telling me all about the I-Touch and I was sold not to mention TOTALLY excited!!! Music AND the Internet-watch out, I'll be harvesting crops ALL DAY!!!

So Haley is planning on making a playlist for me which I've been told will include Black Eyed Peas, Katy Perry, Miley Cyrus AND the soundtrack from Thirteen Going on 30. My current MP3 player has the following:

*Just Add Water (a local punk/skater STL band from years ago...big fan in college but they've broke up now-this is the kind of workout music I like best)
*Britney Spears-Lucky
*Bare Naked Ladies-quite a few songs by them
*Jimmy Buffett
*Jodie Messina (are you catching on that my playlist is all over the board???)
*Tech 9-KC y'all!
*Trina and the list goes on...

Obviously, this music is all over the place and it goes very upbeat to totally slow.

What other songs should I put on there? I'll primarily be using this to workout so I need some pump me up, push me over that last hill, make me feel like a rock star music!!! So please comment with songs I should invest in for my new I-Touch!!!

The Great Debate at Our House...

...is about religion. I know this should have all been discussed and worked out PRIOR to marriage but we got hitched at a winery so it didn't. You would seriously think we're like polar opposites when it comes to this but we're really not. Hubs is Lutheran and I'm Methodist. We can't agree on a church to save our lives...it.is.FRUSTRATING!!!

Hubs grew up Lutheran, went to school Lutheran, knows no other religion than Lutheran so he's 100% stubborn and will not even blink at the thought of learning something new. His family is Lutheran, his friends are Lutheran...everyone but his wife. His wife is Methodist. My big beef with Lutheran is that they don't let me take communion and the way they word it in their bulletin is very misleading but that's another story for another day. I believe that if you confess and repent of your sins then you are welcome to take communion. His church believes the same BUT you also have to believe the Lutheran religion to take communion. So every holiday, I sit all alone in the pew, waiting for everyone to come back so I can slide out or move my legs funny so that they can all sit back down. They do let me get ashes though so that's nice of them.

About a year ago, Matt and I "agreed," or so I thought, to find a church together that was "our" church that we could start attending and raise our children in. We found a church we both really liked last spring but then summer rolled around and he ended up working every weekend so we quit going. This fall rolled around and I was ready to start going again only for hubs to say, "Okay, I'll start going to church again but to MY church." I asked him what had changed his mind and he admitted that he just agreed to find "our" church to make me happy.

Needless to say, we didn't go in the fall. So now Matt has started wanting to go back to church but only at HIS church. He said he didn't feel it was fair for me to ask him to give up his religion. I don't remember ever asking that, I just asked that we find one together. But, at the same time, since he's refusing to budge on going to any church but his own, why should I have to give up mine? I know a little bit about his religion and there's that communion aspect that I don't agree with so why would I join his church when I don't agree with it? He told me I could go to my own church if I wanted too but I want to go to church WITH MY HUSBAND!!! I want US to find a church together!

I'm not 100% not budging from being Methodist as long as I find a church that I can agree their beliefs. FYI-I'm not knocking any religions here just stating that I have different beliefs. The great thing about America is that we have that right to pick what religion we belief in.

So anyways, this is the great debate around our house...happens every 2-3 months.

New Layout...

...so if you can't tell, I got a new layout! And I finally figured out how to add a picture to my heading. This is just temporary until I have time to really mess with this BUT I wanted to ask if you guys had any tips and websites that offer free backgrounds. I really the headers with 2-3 pictures. FYI-I am totally html illiterate so any help would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks!

October 2...

...so Matt and I have two weddings that day which creates some drama. Here's the story, so please leave your comments, advice, questions...

Wedding #1-Matt's cousin is getting married. She asked me to be her DOC and is really depending HEAVILY on me both the Friday before the wedding and the actual wedding day. I'm SUPER excited about it and can't wait to help out. Back story, this is Matt's dad's brother, I don't know the whole story but I do know that Matt's dad and brother don't talk at all, we don't share holidays with them, etc...When she asked me to help out, I okay-ed it with Matt first and he was all good with it. Today, his aunt tells me that they might be asking Matt to be an usher but it's not for sure yet which leads to the other wedding...

Wedding #2-Our best man is getting married the same day. We are great friends with his mom, sis and bro...him on the other hand...well, I'm not going to go into details but a lot of stuff went down with him leading up to our wedding and more and more stuff came out AFTER the wedding, stuff that you just don't do to people that you are supposed to be friends and care about...so when Matt asked him to be our best man, he said sure only if you're mine, this was in December 2007. Well, we got married October 2008 and Matt didn't talk/see him in person until June 2009 where Matt stood up to him and laid it all on the table. He apologized to Matt and Matt asked him to apologize to me...February 2010 and we've only received a couple of generic emails from him. We just assumed that he was planning on Matt not being in the wedding, a couple weeks ago, his sis told Matt that yeah, he's not the best man but her bro is still planning on Matt being in the wedding.

So there you have it, two weddings, one day, a little drama with both...HELP! Thoughts, comments, advice...please try to leave only positive remarks because this already stresses me.